My roomies clearly hate me for being so short tempered and for snapping at everybody who tries to be even a little smart...May be its something to do with my insecurities or may be with the feeling of being a vulnerable 'single in the city'....The recent murder at Bandstand for refusing to pay Ganpati chanda has almost gripped everyone (atleast my roomies) with fear...As it happened, today almost four tall well built (scary looking) guys came to our house to ask for Ganpati chanda.
I outrightly refused to pay them. When they refused to budge, I asked them where had they come from.They said this chanda is for the Ganpati of the west area.I didn't even understand what they meant by 'west area' cuz we live in Lower Parel east.Anyways, so one of roomies overheard the conversation and quickly jumped to pay them some money. That's when we started rant against each other as she said that what if they murder us if we don't pay the money.....I was taken aback at the bizzare sound of that sentence....I shouted my lungs out, "If fifty people come asking us for chanda on Ganpati for each different nooks and corners of the area then are we gonna pay them. And more importantly, are we gonna pay them cuz we live on fear?"...She argued saying that we live alone...It would have been different if we were staying with our families.But my question if some fucking psycho can murder somebody on the road then is there any guarantee that thay can't break in to murderpeople even if there are twenty people in the house.How can we keep getting exploited only on the basis of fear.
I know of a person who has stopped following her daily ritual of going for a morning walk in Joggers park,Bandra because she just can't get over the murder that took place ther some days ago...Again my question is for how long are we gonna change our life course just because of fear...
Even if we are not turning ourselves into heroes, lets not fool ourselves of being martyrs by succumbing to the most irritating thing on earth, Fear...
My roomies won't let me argue with the taxi vala even if he is being a complete asshole just because we are girls and we shouldnt argue with him as 'things can turn nasty'...I mean,how ridiculous is that!
May be I am being impulsive or as I said its my own insecurity ...but whatever... the only thing I Refuse to do is.... live in fear...
2 comments:
Hi! Yes I did read ur blog today:) Trust me,I completely agree with u.Living in fear is the worst form of cowardice and I feel it's just a matter of perspective whether you wanna subjugate yourself to oppression (of any kind)or choose to stand up for yourself.It amazes me when people say that they feel threatened or even scared,especially in a city like Bombay!It's also not a matter of gender coz I feel fear doesnt enter our minds based on our sex.As someone rightly said that the opposite of courage in our society is not cowardice,it is conformity!
Way to go girl...keep fighting!! :D
I appreciate your concern. whole politcs is dependent on fear and we can not do even after understanding it.
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