Boots!

Cities

Paris was not as intense as I had imagined it to be. I have never understood how to explain it but inspite of being the embodiment of a beautiful poem by a poet who has had the perfect amount of suffering, happiness, love, longing, torture in his life, Paris, for me, needed to be more. I wanted more. I had hoped for more. It had the capacity to make me feel pretty naked in my defense towards life but like I said, somehow, the whole experience was just a bit hollow. Each and every building asked for its soul. I was comforted by a new friendship with a fellow backpacker during the first half of my time there and Leonard Cohen in a lovely bookshop and thoughts of a very lovely boy in the second half. There is a reason why I am rambling today about this. Just read this piece on Flavorwire about what these lovely people have to say about monumental Paris and I kind of feel jealous that those emotions evaded me.

Mumbai is resplendent right now. Glistening leaves. Colorful umbrellas. Hard-working chaiwallas with their little stalls and sharp beautiful steam coming out of their aluminium almost-rusted kettles. The sound of the rain. The sights. The clattering sound on the tin rooftops at various places. The raindrops hugging the taxi or the car windows. Old silly Hindi songs on my radio while on my way to work. Schoolchildren jumping into filthy puddles. If this is not the moment to be fully alive then I don't know what is.

Your eyes

Your eyes lie vacant

Sometimes sharp like a lion

Who’s been hungry for three days

Sometimes mellow like migratory birds

On their journey to a new known place

Your eyes are fearless

Like a small lovely town

Undiscovered and flourishing

Your eyes are full of distance

Like a soldier in the enemy camp

Grim and angry

And optimistic about building a country

Your eyes

Slowly trickling down my skin

Quiet and sudden

 On the day we meet 

Weekend. Mother. Kafka's The Trial. Lars and the Real Girl. Smash People's Heads.

This weekend has been so long and nice and justifiably and deservedly so.

I am being treated to piping hot-smothered with ghee-food by mother who has come to live with me for two weeks.Staying with mother always makes me emotional. Very happy. Very edgy. Very decisive. Very confused. Very confident. Very weak. All at the same time. Yup.

Re-watched 'Lars and the Real Girl' yesterday. Had almost completely forgotten it. Gosling is so different in this movie. And brilliant. And I love Emily Mortimer. Even though she usually always plays these sugary roles, I still love her. I don't remember the name of this other movie. I have written about it somewhere on my blog in which there is this scene where she stands naked in front of this guy and just asks him so earnestly to help her practically analyse her body from each and every angle, as she is an aspiring and struggling actress. I just remember that earnestness in her voice and eyes so clearly. Anyhow, 'Lars and the Real Girl' is a pretty interesting film to catch, if you haven't already. Very very intense subject treated with a pinch of butter and salt.

(Image source: designarchives.aiga.org)

Just started reading Franz Kafka's The Trial, finally. It had been stalking and staring at me for years now. Finally decided to give it a shot. 40 pages down and I am in this abysmal world of this person being free and arrested at the same time and we both have no freaking idea about his situation. Intriguing. So far.

In other news, I am feeling a little bit like this. I think I am just keeping my head on my head because my mother is staying with me right now otherwise I am totally in the mood to take a bat and smash some people's heads on the road. Just like that. Just to feel good. Most people are weird. Anyways.

 

  

SUGAR SAYS

 

via http://therumpus.net/

Pretty Much!

Ambivalence

Wanting to clutch
Hold on
Be free as air
Spreading thin
In the sky
Buried inside the earth....